News from Christopher Robin in CA, USA...
This is a personal account of 'where' Christopher is 'at' at the moment.
It contains content that is both depressing and inspiring.
The name may be 'unusual' but I can assure you it's genuine - and his
son
is CR2.
Christopher is an amazing/interesting man. He lives in a house once
owned
by Clark Gable. He was a singer and singing teacher. His wealthy wife
(and her family) left him and took his son. She has used her wealth to
keep father and son apart. Several years ago Christopher designed
Purple
Heart badges that read "Kids need Fathers". Additionally, he put a
purple
heart for every day he hadn't seen his son on the exterior of this house
... and also photos that other fathers sent of themselves and their
children.
-----------------------------------------------------------
3 December 2002
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MY SON! (19 December 2002 - He will be 18.)
Dear Fellow Exiled Fathers, Parents, Grandparents,
It seems like several lifetimes ago. Every day was filled with hope.
All
night and day long, whether asleep or awake, the same fantasy would be
with
me. There was this vision ... that our hard work as activists would be
successful and we would go to court and the judge would say, "I have
reconsidered the situation and have concluded that these children need
both
parents in their lives. I want you parents to stop the conflict and do
what is right for your kids. KIDS NEED BOTH PARENTS!"
I actually was so naive as to believe the judge would be this wise and
kindly man or woman with a conscience and scold both parents for not
considering the fact that children need and love both parents. As time
went on, the truth was revealed that the judge was a LAWYER with a gown
on
... and his purpose was to guarantee the conflict between these two
litigants would continue forever. The purpose was to make absolutely
sure
that the billions and billions of dollars would continue to flow into
the
coffers of all his/her cronies - family law attorneys and judges. In
reality, the judge would rule, "There will be no amicable, friendly,
cordial divorces in this court!" There MUST be conflict!
Remember those early days when you were told to get a good divorce
attorney? You searched the yellow pages, you asked everyone you knew.
You
were given many referrals. It was hard to choose from so many names.
You
had no idea what the future with a divorce lawyer was going to bring.
You
had no idea this smiling man with the friendly handshake was about to
own
everything you had. You were ignorant of the fact that each time you
called him, it would cost you fifty bucks. You had no idea that one
day,
your new friend, the smiling lawyer who made you so many promises of
success - would own your car, your home and everything else you had
worked
for. And, you would no longer have a family. You would no longer be a
parent!
Now, when those just starting a divorce ask me for advice, there is much
to
share. But who will listen? The greatest advice would certainly come
from
someone like you and me. We've already been through the hell of divorce
court. But when you ask 100 people for advice, you will probably
receive
100 different opinions. Since I paid 7 different divorce lawyers a
total
of $150,000.00 and lost every time I went to court, I can give
$150,000.00
worth of advice. My recommendations to the new client are:
1. Try very hard to keep the relationship going. Treat your mate as you
did when you were courting! Okay ... that is probably the most
difficult -
even impossible thing to imagine. But it has worked for a miniscule
percentage of divorce court victims. If reconciliation is impossible,
try
to settle it out of court by being logical - and friendly to each other.
2. Never ever hire an attorney! Whatever is going to happen to you in
divorce court, is going to happen to you anyway. Everyone ... EVERYONE
will tell you that you must have an attorney. But, if you are courageous
and do it alone, you will save hundreds of thousands of dollars and may
be
able to have a life after divorce. A shyster is a shyster is a shyster
...
and without your money, they will lose their Mercedes and be driving a
Yugo!
3. Always be nice - and in control of your emotions! Take an acting
class
or get some therapy so you can act NICE! It's very difficult to control
your angst when you realize you are about to be destroyed. Take a good
look at your soon-to-be-X-mate on the other side of the room. Is that
not
an angel? You have seldom seen that person, the love of your life, look
so
SAINTLY! Your anger will always inflame any situation and if you are
NICE
and at peace, the other side will have far less reason to fight you.
Think, "GHANDI!" The lack of resistance will drive them crazy! Always
insist that you are most concerned about the welfare for your children.
"Tis far better to be humble in court rather than be humbled" - after
they
have taken everything from you.
Even back in those days when I was an activist, just a couple years ago,
when I hoped and prayed that I would some day see my son again, a lot of
advice was disseminated from this Purple Heart House computer. There
was
so much hope then, just a couple years ago. There are those in many
countries who wore Purple Heart buttons when they went to court. There
were even those of you who passed out the buttons to all the litigants
in
court. Some have told me that even the judge on the bench had pinned a
KIDS NEED FATHERS button on his gown. We should have had a picture of
that. Purple Heart House was a wonderful idea and brought so many of us
together. My advice at the end of every passionate piece sent out to
you
all was "NEVER EVER GIVE UP!" In the end, after filing 2 federal
lawsuits
for the courts abuse ... after the abuse of being hauled off by the
Gestapo
and spending time in jail with murderers and rapists, my passion and
optimistic view had changed considerably. The Family Law Gestapo had
taught me a lesson. "Do not mess with our system of corruption!" It
was a
very sad day when I realized that the Purple Heart House was a beautiful
dream for thousands of us ... but in the end, no one who could help us
really cared. And anyone who fought the system would be punished and
penalized forever.
We sadly removed all the purple hearts with your pictures and stories in
them and painted out all the 1400 purple hearts. The purple heart
house
was just a memory and became the old beige house. I apologized to all
my
fellow activists for disappointing them I was ashamed to finally give in
and give up the fight. It was obvious I would never see my son again,
and
every friend on-line who had hopes of more time with the children was
having less and less time.
Rather than getting more rights, more visitation - we all were losing
what
few rights we had. You realize now that my advice to New Victims of
Family
Law Courts is right on.
The Purple Heart House project was gone. I had spent more than four
years
concentrating on what would help us get the attention of the world to
put
pressure on the court system to help families. No one cared. TIME,
PEOPLE, NEWSWEEK, 20/20, 60 MINUTES ... NO ONE CARED!
Who had ever before seen anything like it? Here was Clark Gable's old
home, the four story house in the Hollywood Hills, covered with 1400
Purple
hearts and hundreds of stories and pictures of destroyed families? NO
one
cared!
That incredible passion and thousands of hours planning had come and
gone
and we had no success to show for it. Now, we are older, have less
energy,
less optimism, less to look forward to. We did our best! There is no
way
we could have fought harder. We were just outnumbered and out spent by
the
enemy. We did our best.
There are not many of you reading this who've not been through the
corruption of family law courts. You have the scars to prove it whether
you are male or female, parent or grandparent. Some have a bit of hope
that things may improve ... but most have also come to the conclusion
that
nothing will ever change.
You have realized that in order to function and try to "get over it,"
changes must be made in your lifestyle or the pain and anguish will
destroy
your life and your health.
You have more than likely cried until your body ached. You may have
been
on your knees praying, even though praying had not been a part of your
life. You most certainly have difficulty sleeping. You may have signs
of
gastronomic disorders. You may be having dinner in a restaurant and the
sight of a family with children may cause you to begin to sob, although
tears were never a part of your life. The longing to see your child, to
hear that wonderful voice say, "I love you Daddy!" may be so painful,
you
want to die. You cannot deny that has happened to you.
What do we do to survive this unthinkable hollow space in our lives?
Someone has taken every thing you ever owned and strangers are raising
your
children. It's tempting to deaden the pain by any means possible ...
but
booze or drugs will only lead to more complex problems. Your
number-one-project is to survive and work to become the success you were
-
before family court destruction. You deserve to have a successful
fulfilling life. You have paid and paid and paid your dues. Most
importantly, you must be ready for when your children come back to you.
What is your passion in life? Most people will admit they ended up
SETTLING. They settled for a life that they had never planned or
dreamed
of living. They wanted to be a professional ... to be a doctor but it
was
far too difficult and they settled for being a teacher. Those extra 4
or 5
years of University was just too much. Being a teacher is a wonderful
profession ... but the DREAM was to be a doctor.
Any statistic from any poll taken will state that most people did not
follow their dreams to fruition. When I was a kid, if you asked a
little
boy what he wanted to be and many would say - "a policeman or a fireman
or
an athlete, a spaceman, etc." - countless dreams.
Nowadays, the answer may be, "When I grow up, I want to be a rapper ...
or
a criminal." (just kidding)
Life is different today. Life is far more complex than we have ever
known
it. The events of the past several months, not only in our adventures
in
court, but also in the world situation, have changed us forever. Family
court has given us a jaded look at things. We once believed that we
lived
in the land of the free. We were sure there would be justice when we
sat
in court and there on the wall behind HIM or HER judge, was Lady Justice
... blindfolded and promising fairness, justice and mercy. Now, we have
learned that in family law court - there is no semblance of justice or
fairness. We have also learned that nothing will ever be the same as it
was in the good old days when we had a family, when we were successful
and
confident.
We had passion! Remember when we were so passionate about so many
things?
We had new ideas ... a better mouse trap, a new toilet seat for kids.
We
were constantly imagining new creations in our thoughts, mentally
developing new business inventions that would revolutionize the world.
Did
we let THEM kill our Passion? Remember when your mate would rave about
how
BRILLIANT you were? Maybe she wasn't placating or conning you? Maybe
she
actually observed brilliance in you. It's possible you had some
incredible
ideas that you never fulfilled. You've undoubtedly had passion for many
things in your life ... but you may now have concluded that you can’t
be
that passionate about anything ever again.
After all the pain, the disappointment, the heartbreak - after all the
unexpected disasters that have happened, how could you ever turn your
life
around from the negative to the positive? It will be one of the more
difficult things you have ever achieved, but - you must get over it!
YOU
CAN GET OVER IT!
What do you want to be when you grow up? Sure ... you're a grown up but
you don't have much control over your life. You seldom, if ever, see
your
children. Most of whatever income you have, goes to attorneys, the
courts
or your former mate.
Yup ... you are no longer a grown up because, just like when we were
kids,
some one else controls what happens in your life. No matter how
successful
you've been, you still have very little to say about any decision. You
may
have been a millionaire, a CEO, a powerful icon in society ... but
still,
you have lost control of your life. They have humiliated and humbled
you.
You, this brilliant successful man, can no longer be a parent to your
children. Now, that power has been lost. What do we do? We have
become
powerless in the most important areas of our lives.
What can we do with all that passion inside of us? Where did it go?
Where
does fat go when we lose weight? Now I'm getting silly. Please forgive
me
but it's been a few years since any communication came from this old
computer. I am surely out of practice.
I passed away but - was reborn. It took a month after the Purple Heart
House died for new life to evolve inside of me. The purple hearts on
the
house came to me in a dream. Most great ideas, inventions, and
creations
are born in dreams. What could I possibly do with the rest of my life?
I'm an old white geezer. Was a singer most of my adult life. But old
white
geezers are not popular singers anymore. Oh, oh- I forgot the older
ones
- Tony Bennett and those at Branson.
Okay ... have a college degree ... but no interest in using that. I
like
history ... I love museums ... I love art. Great! Have many art books
...
love the history of stained glass.
Yes... I will find a class on how to make stained glass art! Will put
all
my passion into making beautiful art! YES! The answer to filling the
void, to kill the pain, to keep on living is to make something
beautiful.
And so ... you will see this geezer, old white former singer dude
sitting
for hours every day making designs, cutting glass, soldering lead,
having
the time of my life! The work is difficult since I have severe
arthritis
in my spine… but it doesn't matter. The more we get involved in
something
new, the less pain we feel over our losses in family court.
The first project was a new window in the front door of the Purple Heart
House. Of course, it is a design with a Purple heart in the center.
Making art pieces is what has replaced my passion for singing, for being
an
activist and a father. There had to be something that would be so
beautiful and so creative to replace the love and passion that lives
inside.
As of now, there are around 30 stained glass pieces in this living room
-
from 2x4 feet to the largest which is 2 feet by 8 feet. I am planning
on a
gallery showing within a year or so ... when there are 60 pieces
completed.
You will all be invited.
Of course, the family court Gestapo will also be there confiscating it
all
... so we will use another fictitious name? Maybe this time we'll use
"Cock Robin" as in, "Who Killed?"
My advice to any of you who feel lost and destroyed is to find an old
dream
that you never followed to fruition and complete it! Complete your
education or go back and study something new that has always been of
interest. There is nothing you can't do to make a difference in your
life
... except get justice in the family court system.
God Bless you all. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.
Sincerely,
Christopher Robin, Sr.
Exiled father, former parent. (3,000 days without my son. 8 years)